February. It is the birthday celebration month for my mom and my husband. It’s the shortest month of the year. And it is the hardest month for me to endure.
Sometime around the beginning of November I feel a small sense of panic about the upcoming winter. The idea of cold days, endless viruses circling around school, and the lack of sunlight are enough to make me want to hide away. Every year I swear it will be different. I promise that this will be the year I finally fully embrace winter and refuse to let it get me down. I will exercise outside every day despite the conditions! I’ll look forward to spring by training for a race! I will organize every room in the house since I’ll be stuck inside anyway! I will just simply refuse to let it get the best of me and will remain upbeat and happy! These pep talks seem to work initially, and then February hits. I start feeling down, getting snippy with my family, and then angry at myself for not taking my own advice.
I’ve come to the conclusion that winter is a time to embrace what truly makes me happy in the moment. To remain mindful of how I am feeling, and to acknowledge that winter is a phase and will not last forever. This year I am working on adopting the Norwegian mindset, koselig, which essentially means coziness.
I am learning that if I feel more like yoga than an intense HIIT workout, then that is what I should do. If some days require a blanket and an extra glass of wine, or a chocolate malt and Netflix binge, I allow myself those days. When I find myself becoming uncomfortable due to not getting out enough, I make myself build a snowman with my kids on a sunny day, or schedule a night out with friends. I take a mindfulness approach to days when I feel down. I acknowledge the feeling, accept it is there, and know that for me it will be short-lived.**
While it is still a long way off, with every month that passes I am reminded of how hectic summer with three kids has become. So for now I’m happily embracing my own version of koselig. After all it is true what they say, “If mama ain’t happy, nobody’s happy.”
**This post is personal in nature. It is in no way intended to diagnose any condition or to take the place of medical advice. Please talk to your doctor if you are struggling with seasonal affective disorder.
