Do you have a baby on the way, but zero names you and your partner agree on? Here are the top reasons why you and your partner can’t agree on a baby name – and what to do instead!:
- Focus: Are you volleying baby names back-and-forth as you are rushing out the door? Or, are you texting your partner ideas – only to have them veto them all? Instead, set aside time to talk only about baby names. Even a five-minute chat can help.
- Values: When couples feel stuck, there is usually a deeper reason. Our taste in names mirrors our values, so it is important to discuss big picture goals. Talk to your partner about your hopes for the child and the type of family you would like to build.
- Complexity: You want a name that is an equal reflection of both of you, but you are each complex and unique. Instead of worrying over differences, focus on your common ground. Do you share a core value, such as a love of family, a faith tradition or spirit of adventure? Do you both like similar sounds, name lengths or nicknames?
- Overwhelm: There are endless name options. Even so, every name you like seems to be taken by family or friends. To start, make a list of names you agree on, even if it is a name you cannot use. Identify what these names have in common (i.e. name length, style or meaning) and build on that.
- Experience: Sometimes we make snap judgments about names we are not familiar with. Or, we adore a name, but have not considered how it might work in real life. Before judging a name, say it out loud. Test it using a variety of real-life phrases. Take care with names your partner is especially fond of. You may discover something new.
With attention to these five common barriers, and a curious, respectful approach to your partner, it is possible to find a name you both agree on.
If you would like support with this important decision, Pearl & Lark is a baby name service that will help you agree on a special, meaningful name you both love.
With the step-by-step process, you will save time, find common ground and rest easy!
Written by: Erin Aagesen | Director, Pearl & Lark, LLC
