No, I’m Not About To Pop

The crazy things people say when you’re expecting

People are bound to notice all the physical changes pregnancy brings: growing belly, swollen feet, and myriad weirdness that we all endure while we grow precious new life. Somehow these physical changes trigger some very odd lack of self awareness that leads people to say some pretty surprising things. During my second pregnancy, I started making note of all the crazy things people said. For fun, I added my suggested responses in parentheses.

  1. “Are you having twins?”
  2. At work, weeks before my due date: “You’re still here?” or “You haven’t had that baby yet?” (Yup, still here! Still obviously pregnant! Get me a chair, would ya?!)
  3. “Wow, you’re big! Baby due soon?” (Nope)
  4. “You look like you’re about to pop!” (Please just stop saying this, forever. Pregnant women are not balloons)
  5. “You look tired.” (You look socially unaware)
  6. Finally, any variation of “I knew this friend of a friend who almost died during delivery.” (Great, finally something for me to worry about!)

For the benefit of all mankind, I offer a list of helpful things to say instead:

  1. “Let me carry that for you.”
  2. “I brought you a coffee!”
  3. “Can I get you some food/drink?”
  4. “You look great.”
  5. “I’m so excited for you!”
  6. “Can I set up a meal train for you?”
  7. “I bet you’re tired. Here sit down/put your feet up/etc.”

Let’s face it – pregnant women are basically queens performing magic in their bellies. None of us would be here without a pregnant woman. Can we all agree to just stop saying weird stuff? 

What’s the weirdest thing you heard when you were pregnant?

4 COMMENTS

  1. I had a woman tell me her birthing story of her baby being born with the unbiblical cord around her neck almost killing her. Right before my due date. Thanks, thanks for that.

  2. “WOW!!! You’re HUGE!!” (I was 12 weeks) “Are you sure your not having twins?” As a cosmetologist, and being in the public eye, people said the rudest things to me. I did have one woman tell me I could rest my belly on the back of her chair while I was doing her hair. She said she just loved it. Umm….no thank you.

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