I Was The Perfect Parent Before I Had Kids

Before you become a parent, you have this idealistic version of how your family will be perfect. Most people, myself included, saw kids running and screaming around Target and thought to themselves, “There is no way my child would ever behave like that.” My how the tables have turned.
I assumed I would be the best parent before I had kids. Now if my children are alive and happy, I consider it a good day. These are my top 10 never will it ever moments.
1) “My child will never throw a tantrum in public places.” Well that came to an abrupt end when terrible twos hit my daughter at 18 months. She was that kid that fell on the floor and threw her head back while screaming with all of her might. 
   2) “My child will never play on the floor unless it’s at my house.” Ok, well with my first I was probably slightly more cautious. The 2nd time around, just forget it. Tell that to a rambunctious 8-month-old stuck in an airport with their flight delayed another 2 hours. 
3) “My child will always eat with a fork or spoon.” That’s just funny now. Did you know that rice can be a finger food? Neither did I until I had kids. 
4) On the same note, “My child will always use a plate for their food.” That’s great as long as you don’t want them to actually eat and want a huge mess to clean up. 
5) “My children will never sleep in my bed…EVER!” Here we are still co-sleeping with our 8-month-old. This is the only way everyone gets sleep.
6) “I will never leave the house without makeup on.” After an exhausting day with both kids, a quick run to the grocery store sounds like going to a spa. The last thing I am thinking about is putting on makeup. I just want to run out of the house like it’s on fire. 
7) “My child will bathe every day.” Between school, homework, dinner, and dance classes, there is no way that happens. Unless my daughter smells, I am perfectly OK with every other night.
8) “My child will only breastfeed and eat organic food.” Let me start by saying more power to you if you are a parent who can accomplish this! My first child was formula fed because she had a dairy allergy. My second is breastfed. As for all organic, does anyone have an idea as to how organic a Happy Meal is? 
9) “No screen time until they are 2 years old.” I failed at this one from the get go. For me TV is a background noise, and it has become that for my children too. We have cartoons on pretty much all the time at our house and 90% of the time it isn’t even being watched. My 5-year-old is either coloring, playing with toys, or even off in the other room. 
10) “I will never be that mom who is on their phone when their kids are playing. I will always give them 100% of my attention.” I learned soon enough that moms need a break too. Sometimes to give 100%, we need to take 10 minutes to ourselves and zone out. 
We all start out parenthood with this unrealistic expectation. We set the bar way too high for ourselves. This only ensures that we at some point in time feel like a failure. We won’t ever be able to live up to the version of being a perfect parent like we had in our minds. If your kids are happy and healthy, then you must be doing something right.
Julia was born and raised in Upstate NY. She and her husband moved here 7 years ago and fell in love with Madison. Julia has two amazing little girls. Liliana is a loving, attitude filled, dance obsessed 5 year old. Catherine is a beautiful, sweet, and awfully messy 8 month old. Julia is a stay at home mom during the weekdays and works part time for WKOW doing some behind the scenes work. She loves making conversation with anyone and everyone so to no surprise in her free time she loves to go out with friends and catch up over dinner and drinks.


  1. I said (before kids) I would have rooms in my house that would not be over run by kid stuff. Fast forward to me with 3 month old and a baby swing in our dining room. Oh, the wisdom we could tell our younger selves! 😉


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