‘Tis the Season to Practice Receiving, Too.
You may have read this title and gotten a little confused.
Tis the season, the holiday season, that is, and with that usually all we hear about is giving. I am sure you have a list a mile long of who you all need to buy gifts for. Your spouse, kids, parents, nieces, nephews, kids’ teachers, service workers, your local food pantry, your favorite charity, you name it, it’s on your list.
All we hear about during the holiday season is how much we are supposed to give. In fact, I almost feel like we are pressured into giving, simply because that’s the right thing to do. While I completely support giving, what we need to start doing more of is receiving just as freely as we give.
What do I mean by this?
Earlier this year my husband lost his job. It was completely unexpected and he spent 7 months unemployed. I have never been a very good receiver. In fact, I felt guilty whenever I would receive something from someone. Almost like I owed them back or that I had to do something to deserve this and I didn’t quite feel worthy of receiving! However, I LOVE to give gifts to other people. This was an extremely hard time for me because I could no longer give the way I wanted to, nor could I deny those wanting to help us. I had to say yes. I had to accept freely. It was a very interesting lesson that I was presented with, and one that I am still working on, if I am being honest.
During this time, one of my good friends said something to me that really kicked me in my butt and woke me up. She told me that if you don’t freely accept a gift as freely as you give a gift, then when you give, you aren’t truly giving without expecting anything in return.
At first when she told me this I didn’t get it. I thought to myself, “I love to give and I never expected anything in return”, but then I sat with it for awhile and realized that actually, I do expect something in return. I expect a reaction from the recipient. Whether that means a thank you, an excited response, an appreciation of some sort, or just a simple acknowledgement, I give usually wanting to feel good for giving.
The problem becomes when it suddenly feels guilty for one to receive. Or that we are over-consuming or overindulging when we give something to ourselves. Society, and many people, have voiced their opinion about how terrible it is to buy for yourself and to stop being greedy. While I 100% support giving, and giving to those who truly need it, we can’t simply keep giving and giving and giving without receiving as well. It’s all about balance. I still catch myself getting a pit in my stomach when I buy myself something I want… thinking do I really need this? Do I deserve this? I should be only giving to others right now…
These thoughts run through my head before every purchase I make! Especially during the holidays. However, I am working on letting my inner child come through every now and then, so I can just say yes without the guilt. After all, what is life if we don’t get to enjoy it too?
My Plan to Practice Receiving:
When I receive gifts this season, if I do, I will say thank you with a grateful heart, without the guilt. At least that’s the goal… like I said, I am a work in progress!
What I want to get across mostly is that take some time to truly reflect on what you need, what you desire, and don’t forget about you this season. You are important, too! And the more you feed yourself, your heart, and your joy, the more you have to give to others around you.
How do you plan to practice receiving this season?
