Have you ever wondered how many times in one day you hear, “Mom?” or maybe, “MOM!” or it might even be a “WAAAAA!” It seems that moms are constantly being pulled from one thing to the next, with barely a chance to catch our breaths. This is why it seems to be so hard for us to take time for ourselves. We get into such a habit of doing everything for everyone else. At the end of the day there is no time for you, possibly only a flop on the couch and a little TV before you grumble goodnight to your spouse and turn in for the night. Here are some reasons why you should be making time for YOU a priority every day (and not to feel guilty about it!):
10. Daddy Bonding Time: Kids need time to be with Dad. They need to have a chance to spend time with him one on one even if it makes you a little nervous. Parenting is a shared occupation in which (when at all possible) your partner should be contributing and not just helping. Take that leap of faith and trust your partner to be the best dad he can be without you hovering or correcting (however hard that may be)
9. Having Identity outside of Motherhood: Motherhood is HARD. It is really hard. Especially when you find yourself doing it 24/7. There is just no time off from being a Mom. Do you find yourself only talking about how little Johnny did the cutest thing? Or how Susie is going through this horrible phase with biting? What conversation could you make with friends that did not involve the kids (or work)? It’s healthy for you to take time away and have other interests – especially ones that do not involve kids or work. Goals in life, things that you enjoy doing; keep doing them. Don’t use the kids as an excuse as you will benefit from being a more well-rounded person.
8. Deal better with kids and life: Losing your cool with the kiddos a lot lately? Chances are good that it is a direct result of not getting enough “me” time. It’s like the airlines always tell us, put on your own oxygen mask FIRST then assist others. Taking time for yourself first will give you more space, more patience to deal with life, kids, and stress.
7. Kids learning to deal with life without you: As much of a supermom as you may be, you cannot always be there for your kids. They will go off to school, or a weekend away, or a sleepover in which you will not be there. Giving them a bit of practice in this concept will make things easier for them when they do have life experiences that don’t include you.
6. A break in the monotony: Anyone with Littles will tell you it can get a bit like Groundhog’s day around the house. Every day the same old, same old. Laundry, dishes, cleanup, make dinner, nap time, and…repeat. Breaking up the day with some time for yourself gets you in a better mood to deal with life’s day to day.
5. Stress release: Having kids IS stressful. They are not predictable creatures. They will get sick, you will need to juggle them with a job or other aspects of life. You may have thought that the cute craft on Pintrest was going to be fun to do with the kids, yet some days that idea may have left everyone including yourself on the verge of tears. Stress is part of life. The trick is what you do to reduce that stress. Trying to ignore it just doesn’t work.
4. Being a role model: Imagine your son or daughter as adults. Do you want them to model their life after you? Do you want them to take time for themselves or throw every ounce of energy into their children? The most important part of being a parent is being a role model. Take time for yourself and your kids will see it. They will accept it as a normal part of parenting and adulthood. You are constantly feeling proud of your kids; let them feel proud of you! This is a good thing!
3. Meeting new people, trying new things: the more into adulthood that we go, the more we should stretch and reach for new and exciting things. Putting yourself out there by training for your first 5K or triathlon, joining a book club in the neighborhood or joining a gym are all a good way to do that. Remember how good it feels to be challenged in a positive way. And you may also find yourself making friends with a variety of people that you would never normally expect to come into contact.
2. Better for your marriage: Distance makes the heart grow fonder. Neither of you have to leave town, but spending a little time apart means when you get back together you have experiences to share with one another. You can tell him about your adventures on your bike ride with your girlfriends over dinner. He’ll probably be more interested in that than how many times your little buddy used the potty today.
1. Overall well-being: Being well-rounded is a healthy way to live your life. When you are in the habit to take time for yourself every day, you will have a smile on your face as you greet your family. As we all know, when Mom smiles everyone smiles.
Being a parent is the absolutely BEST job in the world. It’s also something that is ever changing as your kids grow and eventually move on to school and then out of the house. Don’t fall into the trap of losing your own identity during those little kid years. As much as we’d all love an exotic vacation to the Bahamas without the kids, a little run around the neighborhood or a solo trip to Target may feel just as heavenly.
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Julie and Katie have an Ironman (Katie) and countless marathons and half marathons completed between them. They have seven kids between the two of them ranging in age from 6 months to 16. They are both stay at home moms who work at Fleet Feet part time. When they aren’t wrangling kids, you can find them on the road chatting up a storm putting in some miles.
