Today my twins turn ONE. They are 365 days old and I feel tired fulfilled. I can’t say whether it’s been the fastest or slowest year of my life, all I know is that it’s been a blur. A blur of amazing, exhausting, messy and magical all rolled together into two beautiful babies who blessed our lives one short year ago. My heart swells when I think about how lucky I am that I get to be their mom!
Their arrival was anything but mundane. They showed up to the party 10 weeks early and fought through a seven week stay in the NICU before they were able to grace their presence upon our home. They have taught me so much in this first year. I won’t say it was easy (it wasn’t). I won’t say that I enjoyed every minute (I didn’t). I won’t lie and tell you that I’m not tired ALL THE TIME (I am). And I certainly won’t say that we got out much (we didn’t). But I will say that it has been the best year of my life. My heart has overflowed with love and I feel like I can conquer the world. And to all those who say ‘Better you than me…’ – I agree… I’m so glad it’s me who gets to be the one they call mama!
So here are some of the things that my twins have taught me after one year!
- Even though they are the exact same age (give or take 18 minutes) and are parented the exact same way – they have very unique personalities and it’s so rewarding to watch these develop!
- Car seats are HEAVY… especially when you are carrying two.
- Some stores offer ‘twin’ discounts… just ask! Stride Rite at Hilldale offers a 15% discount for twins!
- They learn to share early on (not necessarily a bad thing!) They share my attention, they share germs, they share blankets & bottles (not always on purpose), they share a stroller, they share a birthday…
- There is nothing I dread more than cutting baby fingernails & toenails. So when I manage to cut all 40 at once I feel like I have completely mastered an art!
- You know how I just mentioned 40 nails? They will also start cutting teeth – 40 teeth total to be exact (Ugh!)
- Together my one year old babies now weigh 45 pounds. Who needs a gym with barbells when you’re lifting babies all day?!
- Boy/Girl twins can NOT be identical. (People ask me this ALL the time.)
- Twins are (almost) always a surprise. Even if you battled through infertility or if they run in your family, I think we can all agree that there is still an element of surprise the first time you see two beating hearts on the u/s! (People ask me this, too.)
- Perfect strangers will look at your twins (when you feel like you have things all together) and say ‘good luck…’ and others (when you are feeling like a hot mess) will say ‘ohhhh I always wanted twins!’ (Just smile at them.)
- There will be tears and more crying… the cold hard truth is that you can’t always console two babies at once and your heart will hurt when you are comforting one and the other starts to cry. (Just remember that on the flip side, at other times this also means more smiles & more baby giggles – and nothing beats that!)
- They have their own language, play together and can sometimes be entertained by a pink ball for an hour.
- On the other hand there are NO breaks… someone always needs something. So when they hit the hay at night – take full advantage of that glass of wine and Pottery Barn catalog you’ve been neglecting all
- You will become a baby jungle gym… sometimes I have all 3 of my kids climbing on my legs while I’m cooking dinner. (It’s a leg workout, amiright?!)
- Your days may be a blur and I won’t tell you to enjoy every minute. But do savor the smiles, the cuteness, the giggles & the snuggles and find joy in the journey. Your hands will always be busy, but your heart will always be full. And from what I’ve heard it just keeps getting better and better with each year!
If you have a friend who is in her first year with multiples, give her a little grace. It is probably extra difficult for her to leave her house. She may not respond to your call or text right away despite how desperately she wants to talk to you. Know that this is quite possibly the most challenging and demanding year of her life. If you live nearby, offer to watch her kids for a morning so she can leave the house or take her a meal. If you are a long distance friend, remind her that it WILL get easier. Chances are she KNOWS she’s blessed, but that in this moment she may be struggling. It has been tough, but with each milestone and each smile our hearts have grown. I have had moments of weakness and tears where I feel spread thin and defeated, but those moments are fleeting and the big picture is amazing. I am so thankful for the blessings in my life and full hands give me an even fuller heart!
You may also enjoy my post from a year ago: 15 Things You Learn After You Give Birth to Twins